The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
Randomize