She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
sex in a hospital.. check
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
Randomize
