I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
Randomize
