Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
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