the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Randomize
