She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
When I told my mom I was having a rough time, she responded with "pop a xanax, take a nap, and when you wake up all will be right with the world." My mom is finally starting to shape up.
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
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