Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
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