This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize
