Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
Randomize
