i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
Why are your pants in the freezer?
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Randomize
