You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
Randomize