I intend to get homeless drunk
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
Randomize
