You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
Randomize
