so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
Randomize
