Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
Randomize
