i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Randomize
