okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
Randomize
