if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
Couch. On fire.
That was before I lit my hair on fire
Randomize
