Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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