the day after is always just damage control
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
Randomize