everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
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