So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Randomize
