Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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