I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
Randomize
