everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
Randomize