I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
