She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
my shit smells like andre
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
