I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
