I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
Randomize
