i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
as a side note pls kill me
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
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