The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
Randomize