I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Randomize
