I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
Princesses don't give blow jobs
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
