My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Randomize