Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
See, the Lortab wasn't working enough, so I thought "hey, vodka can speed that up! That's how science works!" Which probably should've been my indication that the Lortab was in fact working
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
Randomize
