ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
I knew I had to get an abortion when his toddler sister came up to hug my leg and I kicked her off saying, "Get off, fucker."
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
