I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize