hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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