I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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