I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
Randomize
