I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
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