Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Randomize
