david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
Randomize
