Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize