ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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