sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
Randomize
