I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
Randomize
