can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
Randomize