Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize
