so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
Randomize
