So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
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