We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
Randomize